~~Part One~~

Nikolas appears out of a foggy night to stand at the edge of The Docks, staring out over
the water to the forbidding shape of Wyndemere looming in the distance.  He is startled
when Lex draws up beside him.

Lex: Something wrong?
Nikolas: Of course.  I'm a prince, you know.
Lex: I see.  I'm a scion.
Nikolas: Heir to a legacy that rests heavy on your shoulders like an uncomfortable burden
of some kind?
Lex: Driven former-degenerate not-quite idly planning a coup on at least part of my
father's company.
Nikolas: Ah.  Fathers.
Lex: Yeah.  Mine's an Art of War groupie with an Alexander the Great complex who
reads me gay love poetry when he's not undermining my authority at work or having sex
with my shallow, manipulative lover.
Nikolas: Really?  My dad's an obsessive megalomaniac with a blonde fixation who tried
to freeze the world, was kept in cryogenic stasis for twenty years, then came back from
the dead to poison my family members, kill a few people, and try to seduce my girlfriend.
Lex: Huh.  My father might be dead right now.
Nikolas: Mine too.
Lex: Without my ever having had a real chance to figure out if he even cared about me.
Nikolas: Same here!  I don't even know if my dad was capable of normal love.
Lex: Mine might have scarred me emotionally for life.  There's no telling what kind of a
monster I might turn into down the road, all because of my father's influence.
Nikolas: I keep hoping that whatever goodness I inherited from my mother is strong
enough to keep me from turning into him, but the darker path is so--
Lex: --Seductive.  And with all that money and power that comes with his name, it's so
easy just to--
Nikolas: --Give in.
Lex: [stare]
Nikolas: [stare]

And then they have sex.

~~Part Two~~

Lex enters Kelly's, straightening his jacket.  Lucky, who is sitting sullenly at a table
facing the door, jumps up and goes to stand in his path.  Unless otherwise noted, all of
Lucky's lines will be delivered in a voice resembling a monotone yell.

Lucky: I saw you on the Docks with Nikolas.  What were you doing with him?
Lex: Excuse me--do I know you?
Lucky: I'm Nikolas's brother.
Lex: Really?  [pause]  So, do you hate your father, too?
Lucky: What?
Lex: Nikolas seemed so unhappy about him, I just wondered--
Lucky: No!  We don't have the same father.  And I love my dad!
Lex: Oh.
Lucky: Well, except for a while after I found out that he raped my mother, when I was all
mad about the possibility that I could end up like him.
Lex: Oh?
Lucky: But I got over it.  I think.
Lex: Oh.
Lucky: But I want to talk about what you were doing with my brother on the Docks!
Lex: What did you think I was doing?
Lucky: I don't know.  I just saw you two talking, and then I came in here.  I'm not an
eavesdropper!
Lex: Of course not.  But why is it any of your business what I was doing with Nikolas?
Lucky: Because...I...
Lex: Yes?
Lucky: Because...because he's a liar and a manipulator, just like his father!  And if he's
sneaking around having secret meetings on the Docks, I want to know why!  Because if
he's trying to put together another dumb plan that involves lying to and manipulating the
people I care about, I'm gonna go to Wyndemere, track him down, maybe find him doing
his stupid Tai Chi exercises, all shirtless and sweaty and barefoot, breathing hard
with...his eyes all unfocused...and I'm gonna...
Lex: Yes?
Lucky: ...I'm gonna...yell at him.
Lex:  I see.
Lucky: So tell me what you were doing with him!
Lex: Well, as it turns out, I don't feel particularly inclined to tell you what we were doing
together.
Lucky: But--
Lex: However, I could always show you.
Lucky: Oh.  [pause]  Oh!  Well, okay then.

And then they have sex.

~~Part Three~~

Carly is striding angrily around the patio outside Kelly's when Lex exits, adjusting the
collar of his shirt.  She doesn't see him, and they collide.

Carly: Watch it!
Lex: I'm...sorry?
Carly: Yeah, you should be.  Don't you know who I am?
Lex: No.  Although if I felt like it, I could ask the same of you.
Carly: What?  Never mind, look--I am Carly Corinthos, okay?  My ex-husband is a very
powerful man around here, and you do not want to mess with me, because he'll get
angry.
Lex: Corinthos?  Not the Corinthos of Corinthos-Morgan Coffee Imports?
Carly: Yeah.  I see you have heard of him.
Lex: Oh, absolutely.  My father bought his company for a song last year after that
unfortunate warehouse fire sent their stock into a tailspin.
Carly: ...What?
Lex: Lex Luthor.  Pleasure to meet you.
Carly: Oh. [pause]  Yeah, whatever.  [longer pause]  Still, you should watch where
you're going.  I've just been through a really--[sniff]--really terrible ordeal, and I'm still a
little...fragile.
Lex: Really.
Carly: Hey, if you'd spun your car out over a cliff and into a lake, you'd be fragile too!
Lex: Does off a bridge into a river count?
Carly: ...Huh?
Lex: I was going sixty miles per hour when a roll of barbed wire fell off a truck into my
path.  I couldn't stop or swerve in time, so I drove right over it.  I went into a spin,
crashed through the bridge railing, and went right into the river.
Carly: Wow.  I mean--uh, yeah.  Did I mention I drove off a cliff in my accident?
Lex: I was knocked unconscious--
Carly: Me too!
Lex: --and my heart stopped for about two minutes.  Luckily, a local farmboy--who I
could've sworn I hit as I went off the bridge--dove in, pulled me out, dragged me to shore
and brought me back to life.
Carly: Oh.  I...didn't have one of those.
Lex: I highly recommend them.
Carly: Well...well, everybody thought I was dead for a while.  When I'd recovered enough
to come back to town, I walked in on my own funeral.
Lex: Must've been interesting.
Carly: Oh yeah.  I thought most of the people there hated me!  And there was a body in a
casket and everything.
Lex: How did--?
Carly: Don't ask.
Lex: Ah.
Carly: Of course, the worst thing was the reason why I was upset enough to lose control
of the car in the first place.  My husband--
Lex: Your ex-husband?
Carly: Yeah, whatever--he actually slept with his lawyer.  And I saw them!  Together!  I
swear, it made me so mad, I was ready to just--
Lex: Yes?
Carly: --have impulsive anger-sex with the first good-looking guy I found!
Lex: I see.
Carly: God, you know...I still get all...worked up, just...thinking about it...
Lex: [pause]

And then they have sex.

~~The Final Chapter~~

AJ: Courtney, are you comfortable?
Courtney: Yeah, I'm good.  I'm a little surprised that you're okay with all this, when you
were so dead set against me working tables at Kelly's...
AJ: They're two entirely different things.  You'd have to work yourself to the bone at
Kelly's, and for what?  A few measly tips?  This was a much better suggestion.
Courtney: But I wasn't the one who--
AJ: I just want you to have the kind of life you deserve, the kind of life I promised I could
give you when you married me.  Grandfather and his money can go to hell; I can provide
for you without the family bank account.  I love you, Courtney, and I'm willing to do
whatever it takes, no matter what or how or where or when or with eyeliner or--
Courtney: Wait, what?
Lex: He's fine.  Drinks?
AJ: God yes.

And then--all together now--they have sex.

THE END!

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